2009 August | MY Vast Right Wing Conspiracy

Archive for August, 2009

The Artery Clogger 3000 is here

Several sites have this so we’ll add to it. Meet the KFC Double Down ~~chickenwich~~ sandwich. It is bacon, smothered in cheese and the Colonel’s sauce all between 2 breaded chicken filets. I could feel my arteries crying in anticipation of their upcoming punishment when it arrives in NC. Jason and Jess at this is why you are fat had a review:

That’s it? That is the sandwich? That’s not worth five dollars. Oh… oh my God. That is the best thing ever. I don’t know what “Colonel’s Sauce” is, but it is like a party in my mouth. This is completely worth the five dollars. Unfortunately I’m going to end up weighing 700 lbs after this, but it is simply amazing.

Here is a picture of this magnificent beast:

Can’t wait to get one. Oh, and thank you KFC for an entree that tells all the food Nazi’s who want to ban this and that to go F’ themselves. Love it!

A little humor for a distraction

MA Special Election

With the unfortunate passing of Ted Kennedy, we find ourselves in the reality that there’s now a Senate seat to be filled by a special election in MA. This is a good chance to try and rebuild the GOP north of the Mason-Dixon, even if the circumstances that bring it about are sad. I say we go after this seat with the best foot we can put forward. That, to me at least, suggests tapping the last GOP candidate to win something big in MA, Mitt Romney. I think if we put him out there to run for the seat, we’ve got a shot at this one. Wouldn’t that be something to win back filibuster strength by taking a Massachusetts Senate seat?

a crime discussion

So Joseph Graves (17), Matthew Morgan (17), Marcus Fluker (15) and Tahjaue Wiley (18) were bored one night. So what to do? Well, in Thugville, it’s always fun to find an elderly couple, kick in their door and rob them. Which is exactly what they did. First they attacked the old man aged 76 in his shed. Then they attacked his wife. Once they had them tied up, they ransacked the house and took what they wanted and took off. Unfortunately for the thugs, homeowner C.L. McClure got free, retrieved his gun and took off after them. Now not all the details are in, but what is known is that a third of a mile down the road, C.L. opened fire on them, hitting Marcus who died at the hospital.

Now the community outrage is deafening. It would be a lot worse if C.L. had been white, but the whining is still going on. Tahjaue put on his myspace page that he is shocked it went down like that. Notice, not SAD. Not sorry they got caught. Not sorry their friend died. Nooooo, just shocked that it went down like that. Marcus’ mom says the typical stuff, “He was a good kid. Never did nothing wrong. blah blah blah.” It kills me. Where are these idiots when these “good kids” are bringing home stuff that mom and dad DIDN’T BUY there’s no way that the kid could have? I can just hear the bleatings now. “Oh, well, he said he found the 52 inch flat screen. And all that jewelry, well, he said he got them for helping old ladies across the street”

Tahjaue was arrested and there is already a “Free Tahjaue” movement going on. Pathetic. The police have not arrested C.L. yet.

So what say you? Good shoot? I don’t own a gun, because I would be a lot less controlled than C.L. When you have my hot temper, you don’t own guns. However, I know a lot of you are. So what say you? I say good for him. One more worthless waste of humanity who is now being bent over by the devil. Unfortunately, C.L. didn’t get the rest of the rat bastards. Better shooting next time.

The thugs do have myspace pages.

Here’s Tahjaue. So the guy with his middle fingers up, who is in a “savage pussy” mood and is in jail has God as a hero. And I thought Swaggart was funny.

~~Corpse’s~~ Marcus’ page here.

Not sure which of the others, but here’s one more.

Post Your Burning Saltires Here

In appreciation for Kenny MacAskill’s decision to free a mass murdering terrorist, I’ve decided to buy a Scottish flag, and take a nice little video of my burning it and stomping it out. I’ll post video when I go through with it. Please, if anyone else feels so inclined, post your own videos as well.

P.S. Make sure those flags aren’t themselves made in Scotland.

R.I.P. Robert Novak

Love him or hate him, you had to respect Robert Novak. He was a straight shooter. I used to be a fanatical watcher of The Capital Gang. I loved watching him on that. The best one ever was election night 1994 when the Capital Gang had a special post election show. Shields and Carlson had predicted that the dems would lose seats but keep both houses. Hunt said a split. Only Novak was gutsy enough to predict that blowout. They opened like they always did with Hunt introducing the gang. First to Mark Shields and Margaret Carlson with their sour faces. Then they panned to Novak. His shit eating devilsh grin had me laughing so hard I had to hit the record button on the VCR because I couldn’t hear it over my laughing. He was always great on that show and on crossfire. He will be missed.

R.I.P. Mr. Novak.

Friday Night Fun

bwahahahahahaha

Time for a bit of humor. As you know, the southern states are going up up up the ladder on the fattest people in the nation stats. My great state of North Carolina is doing its part too, climbing several slots in the last check. So you know the populace of North Carolina is getting wayyyy too fat when this happens. Yes, it’s time for that time honored tradition, the county fair! And just what has the state of North Carolina worried? Well, swine flu, that’s what. But no, it’s not that the swine will infect humans, it’s that the lardasses (human swine) will infect the animal swine! BWAHAHAHAHAHA! No, seriously, I’m not kidding, here’s the link! Now, the article hims and haws around it, but the title should be “Officials worried that Porkers will infect Porky”… Yeah, I’ll catch hell for this one, but come on, you have to laugh…

My wife asked if they really think anyone with the flu is going to feel like going to the fair? If it’s as bad as it has been made out then not even the draw of elephant ears, watered down lemonade and overpriced near death experiences called rides can overcome that.

Then again, this is North Carolina and they do have rodeo, wrestling and demolition derbies at the fair. Even the near dead will turn out for that. Best watch your back Porky!!!

Even the bad news is glorious when Obama is in charge

The word rebound has many different meanings. A retreived ball off a miss in basketball. A new relationship after a breakup. Recovering from illness. Coming back from substance abuse problems. All of them are a positive thing. So, imagine my intrigue when I read this headline from CNN.

Initial jobless claims rebound

You see, the initial jobless claims went UP instead of continuing the expected down direction. In other words it’s BAD news. But hey, we can’t have bad headlines when Obama is in charge. No way. So, instead of “Jobless claims rise unexpectedly” or just “jobless claims rise”, we have to make sure it sounds pleasant. So they “rebound” instead.

The other day a black man was beaten to a pulp and put in the hospital by 4 white men. While the whites beat him, they called him “nigger” and other racial nasties. A hate crime to be sure. But no, not this time. Because ~~this man was an Obama opposer~~ this is a new age of post racial yada yada yada. I wonder if they will be charged at all seeing how the Obama of Oz and his cronies tossed the case of that black panther who brought a weapon to a voting place with the express purpose of stopping people from voting. Besides, not that anyone would know it since not one word was written in the press about either of these.

Finally, from Gateway Pundit, a blue dog democrat falls in line with Pelosi and calls the people who don’t want Obamacare “political terrorists“. Do you Obama lovers really think you’ll hold the house? This guy is toast next election. He’s supposed to be a smart democrat and not a Pelosi lapdog. His voters will remember this.

But hey, Obama is in charge. That means all your hurts will heal and your dreams will come true. Remember, he’s going to pay your mortgage eventually!

The Virtue of the Vicious

As if it weren’t bad enough that Obama has asked Americans to begin reporting disagreements with his health care agenda to flag@whitehouse.gov (can you imagine the outcry on the left if Bush had done this with respect to the Iraq War), now Nancy Pelosi thinks if you show up to a meeting to express your outrage and frustration that you are un-American. If the right went too far with tacit attacks on the patriotism of war dissenters, the left has now made itself no better with respect to the health care debate. It is now clear that the Democrats in Washington are intent on using patriotic rhetoric and Orwellian tactics to puch Amsoc down our throats whether we would have it or not, and woe unto he who would dare stand against it. Oscar Wilde made the eponymous assesment of patriotism, it merely took America 8 years to see that both sides could be equal opportunity offenders of this ugliness.

Sooo, let me get this straight

According to our fearless leader, Fuhrer Obama, Ahmadinejadis the legitimate president of Iran and that’s that. Nothing to see here. Nothing bad took place. Those protestors were just bussed in tea party hacks. Meanwhile the current president of Honduras, Micheletti, who assumed power when the Congress and Supreme Court of the country followed their constitution and basically impeached and removed the corrupt Zelaya from power is not legit. The military of Honduras not only didn’t back Zelaya, but obeyed the Supreme Court and escorted him out of the country. All of that was done per the constitution of Honduras, but somehow Micheletti is not a legitimate leader. Our president is a friggin moron… Thanks 52%’ers.