A Prank After My Own Heart
It doesn’t quite match up to the old crap in a bag on fire, but it will do:
Three days before Christmas, a Palos Heights woman got quite a shock when she opened a package that arrived for her at home.
She quickly realized it wasn’t a gift from Santa Claus, as the tag said.
“I picked it up, it was red and squishy,” said Kelly, 18, who asked that her last name not be used. “Then I saw an eyeball looking at me, and I freaked out.”
The box contained an animal’s bloody head.
Palos Heights police believe it was a prank but are continuing their investigation.
Kelly, a freshman at the University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign, is a vegan and does not eat any animal products. Her best friend and boyfriend also are vegans, and many of their friends are vegetarians.
“I’ve been asking all my friends, and I don’t know anybody who would do something like this,” she said. “My friends would all know that I take being a vegan seriously and wouldn’t find it funny.”
I find it hilaroius. Payback is a motherfarker.
Don’t be sad for the animal, if you read the article, it was most likely properly devoured by rational, human type creatures.
But this line at the end has me snorting beer through my nose:
“It’s just horrible,” she said. “I never thought that someone would do something like this in real life. It’s like something you’d see in a movie.”
No, darlin’, you wouldn’t see this in a movie. No self-loathing Hollywood leftard would make a movie detailing the suffering of animals released to certain death by the Animal Liberation Front. No Hollywood studio would film the thousands of worthy pets slaughtered each year by PeTA owned shelters. No bleatasticfarktard of a Hollywood director would ever chronicle on celluloid how the Sioux Indians would stampede Bison off a cliff.
You should be grateful, it’s the only head you’ll ever get.
d says:
I’d bet she pissed off a hardened Chicago sout’ sider who wanted to send a little zing.
Being a south sider myself, I’ve been known to punch a few buttons like that.
MacStansbury says:
gonna have to disagree there, Vino…that sounds EXACTLY like what some Hollywood type would do. complete with the EVIL Republicans who killed that perfectly innocent lamb, just to scare that righteously indignant woman, as the authorities but the EVIL Republicans in jail for their EVIL crimes.
cause they’re EVIL.