MY Vast Right Wing Conspiracy

A Message for the Uptight

• Posted by Beth on January 8th, 2005 filed in General    

Well, well, well. I saw LATE last night that while I was chained to the desk yesterday deleting trackback spam every five minutes, some other people were quite busy themselves.

World Net Daily (sorry, it’s not a credible publication, IMHO, but I digress) had a couple of articles yesterday which was the source of much consternation and–dare I say it?–infighting (mild, but still) among Republicans on the internet.

What a farking disgrace.

I’ll give you the opportunity to not continue reading, because the language might be too much for some people to bear. I am disgusted.

Michelle Malkin, whom I hold in THE highest esteem and has NOT acted like an asshole about this Kid Rock issue (read the WND article–don’t make me re-hash it, PLEASE), posted her report/opinion on this yesterday. This is the rare occasion where I don’t agree with her at all. Now go read her piece. She opened up her comments for this one…and my God, there sure are a lot of UPTIGHT, narrow-minded fools who jumped right in.

[Let me stop you right there, you salivating liberal reading this. In NO WAY do I think most of the commenters represent the majority of Republicans, so settle down before you need a paper bag to stop the hyperventilating. I'm giving MY view of this "issue".]

First, I have to say I think Kid Rock’s “music” SUCKS, just like any other rap-rock crap. But for Chrissakes, the guy is if anything, self-parodying. His whole schtick is basically, “look at me, I’m white trash from Detroit with a mullet and a midget.” (Well, he used to have a midget in his act.) The guy used to be Pamela Anderson’s flavor-of-the-month. It’s a JOKE, get it? And NO different from any other popular act, yes he does have foul lyrics. Guess what? Country musicians aren’t saints, either–and lots of Republicans (not me, though) love country music. Yes, yes, yes, I read the lyrics Michelle Malkin posted as an example, too.

But here’s the deal: Kid Rock, unlike the ridiculous majority of musicians and “entertainers” (cough cough) demonstrates ACTIONS that speak louder than WORDS. He actually goes and performs for the troops with the USO, which is a hell of a lot more than I can say for that moonbat Springsteen or even some of the overrated country singers that some Republicans love.

One commenter, “Jon,” put it this way as well, referring to last year’s Super Bowl show:

…after reading the ignorant comment about KR’s being “controversial” and the prediction of a “wardrobe malfunction” by Joe, I have to call Bullshi’ite. If you watched that performance, Kid Rock was a part of it, and he had the cleanest, most patriotic, most appropriate set of the night. Did he have semi-scantily clad girls dancing about? Sure. Were their boobs flopping out? No. Did he change the lyrics to fit the occasion? Yes. The man’s done USO shows and got the invite. I think you can rest assured that he’s not going to spit “I’m gonna fark some ho’s after I leave this place.” at some point.

Enough about Kid Rock. What a dumbass “controversy.”

Contrary to many people’s misconceptions, there are a lot of Republicans–even conservative ones like me–who happen to like rock music. In fact, I listen to much harder rock than Kid Rock, and yes, it’s profane. I don’t care. It’s only rock and roll, but I like it.

SOME of the commenters in Malkin’s thread (and even some in the comments at Protein Wisdom, here) sound like they think that if you listen to (or most assuredly use) foul language, you’re not a “real” conservative. I read the terms “Big Tent,” “South Park Republican” (what the fark is that?), and “social libertarian” tossed around quite a few times. One guy even said, “I’ll wager some of your commenters in support of that excrement can understand how someone could be offended by a nativity scene and the 10 Commandments in a courtroom, too.” Pleeeease.

Let me get this straight with those of you who shoot these arrows. I am NO social libertarian, big tent, mealy-mouthed moderate. Got it? In fact, I’d be willing to bet I’m every bit as conservative as you are on the issues that matter. Ten Commandments, school prayer, abortion, fetal stem cell research…I’m with you all the way on those issues. You got anything else you want to challenge me on? Am I no longer a “true” conservative because I have a potty mouth and do not care if anyone else does?

Did I miss a farking checklist somewhere?

How about this…let’s see if you can check off these items on this imaginary list. Are you a veteran? I am. I’m also a divorced (read: single) stay-home-mother, because I think it’s important for my young daughter. I make real sacrifices for a variety of reasons (which are incidentally, not really your business) because I’d rather my daughter have a full-time mother than buy that big farking convenient SUV the liberals laugh at us about. Yes, I’m lucky to have an ex who pays support, but if I wanted to buy all the nice stuff everyone else has, I’d get a job like you.

Have you checked off those items? Are you livin’ large to make those car payments and day care expenses while you let someone else raise your kids when you don’t HAVE to? How about the military? Are you a veteran, or do you just have a sticker on “the bumper of your SUV?” Do you even bother to put your money where your mouth is? I do, although it might not be big-league money.

Now honestly, I don’t care about your conservative “credentials.” Nor should you question mine or anyone else’s, based on something as STUPID as their taste in music or use of salty language, of all outright ridiculous things. Actions speak much louder than words. I walk the walk, and as far as I’m concerned, Kid Rock–as trashy as he appears–does too. So do Ted Nugent (potty-mouth, slutty past), Gene Simmons (also foul, and really slutty), Hank Williams Jr., Charlie Daniels, etc., etc., etc., ad nauseum.

Bill from INDC had it right, as far as I’m concerned. You morally outraged bunch need to stop obsessing over inconsequential crap like this and focus on the important issues (whether they be economic, social, or international). This is no issue. Jeff Goldstein had this right on the money too, by mocking the whole thing in the first place (and being on the right side of this non-issue). Watch out, you Tipper Gore types, or you’ll end up alienating a lot of people who are not as die-hard conservative Republican as I am.

I’m warming up now to bombard the AFA, CCF, and CWA with a flood of email if they try pulling off some stupid shi’ite like a boycott. Boycott something that MATTERS. Leave this one alone, and quit acting like a bunch of moonbats.

UPDATE: Another Bush supporter (who most certainly will NOT be receiving an invitation to play at Jenna and Barbara’s inaugural party): Marilyn Manson. HA!

A much more shocking bit of political information can be found in Talk at the end of “Marilyn Manson Has a Secret,” Tucker Carlson’s profile about the ghoul-rocker. Though Manson has spent his entire career thinking up successful ways to repulse and enrage adult America, it turns out that he is really a conservative, bourgeois guy with strong Republican leanings.

His complaints about America’s vulgar, mindless entertainment and people who don’t use good grammar make him sound like Bill Bennett. And, most shocking of all, Manson — who says he loathes Gore and Sen. Joseph Lieberman — tells Tucker that “If I had to pick, I’d pick Bush, and not necessarily by default.”

You’d expect Manson to be more disposed to voting for Libertarian Party guy, Harry Browne, the Official Presidential Candidate of this column. Or maybe Ralph Nader, the choice of the suddenly pragmatic Nation, which urges the progressive faithful to vote for St. Ralph only in states where the Bush-Gore race isn’t close.

But Manson backs Bush — just like the conservatives at National Review do in their newest issue.